Animals in Spirit

“They restore our forgotten childlike wonder at the world, and they reawaken our lost belief in magic, dreams and possibilities.” [1]

I am human.

What else could I be? I had no idea, upon first being asked what my spirit animal was. I was bewildered. Being somewhat afraid of animals can do that to you.

However, once the vision quest came on, and I slipped from reality into a semi-dream, semi-thoughtful state, imagining the journey the speaker described, I slowly lost my doubt. I was walking through a forest, leaves crunching beneath my feet, slim silver trunks glittering at the edge of my vision, and a warm feeling of safety caressed me. I knew something, or someone was approaching. I continued to stroll leisurely, glancing about at my surroundings (which looked much like I imagined a mix of Lothlorien and Sherwood Forest to look) with piqued curiosity, until I felt a presence above my shoulder. It was strong, and old, and unwavering. I could feel a sort of ancient wisdom near me, and it was terrifying as well as captivating, and strangely soothing.

It was Owl.

As I thought more and more about my spirit animal over the first few weeks of class, I noticed another presence touching me. Owl was always there, perched sometimes on my shoulder, sometimes on branches above me, but always near, a strong, watchful spirit to keep me company. However, a smaller, lighter, effervescent being was visiting me often, touching playfully upon my awareness. I was intrigued. It felt like my kindred spirit, something fairy-like and magical, and too quick for me to catch. Being my kindred spirit however, its identity could not be hidden long, and when I realized what my new friend was, I knew with utter certainty that this too was my spirit animal.

It was Hummingbird.

There is a distinction between my two spirit animals. I have much to learn from both of them, but I feel that Owl serves as a guardian spirit, while Hummingbird is closer in character to my own personality.

“Owl’s voice travels far, telling of the mysteries of dreaming and the feminine…She signifies introspection, and having looked deeply into the dark and witnessed its secrets, she is a keeper of wisdom.” [2]

I have always been fascinated by owls. I have an owl necklace which I wear embarrassingly often, and there is a picture of an owl on my Inspiration Wall in my room. There is an image deeply impressed in my memory, a National Geographic photograph of a snowy owl, its head swiveled to face the camera, great golden eyes piercing straight through the picture and into the viewer’s soul. I’m not certain why I remember this image – we stopped receiving National Geographic several years ago - but that straightforward, unafraid stare touched me in some indelible way. I was a naturally shy person, and the fearlessness of the owl struck me deeply. I used to watch for owls when I was a child, hoping one would bring me an invitation to attend Hogwarts. I nearly attended Rice University, who’s mascot is an owl, and I am a Plan II student – the mascot for which is also an owl! One of my closest cousins is named Athena after the goddess of Wisdom. Athena’s symbol is the owl.

I have always been afraid of animals – fascinated and intrigued by their beauty, but from a distance. I loved to read about them, both fictional and non-fictional stories, but couldn’t get too near. My father once took me to a petting zoo, and while the other children delightedly cuddled the lambs and goats, I locked my arms around my father’s neck and cried. However, having the owl as my spirit animal feels completely natural. It is the animal that has cropped up in my life most often; not in person, but in spirit. Like the owl, I’m very introspective. I often sink deep into thought, letting my surroundings fall away, content to examine some issue or thought alone. I am comfortable in solitude as well as company, and my creative processes come to full fruition in the dark. The owl is a creature of the night, and I am too. I am fascinated by the jet black inky quality of the night sky, the mystery and elusive spirit of the darkness, and the silky coolness of evening.

While taking art classes, I had a lot of work to bring home. I nearly drove my father to madness when he found out how late I’d stay up working on my artwork, so I stopped informing him. My mother, another creative soul, found my odd habits completely natural. It wasn’t that I didn’t desire sleep, or that I wasn’t dead tired. I was. But something more important, something much bigger than me, took over, infused me with the energy of inspiration, and I had no choice but to get to work. I became a creature of the night. The qualities of the night and of the dream world would flow into my artwork as well. It became very easy for me to identify with Owl once I recalled both of our affinities and heightened senses of awareness in the dark.

Owl is also known for its intuition and wisdom. I would not call myself wise, but I am an old soul. I feel both far older than my years, and far younger – but I’ll get to the younger part later. I am very alert and observant around people, and notice what others may not. I like to understand how people think, and therefore, observe them in ways different from what’s “normal.” This may be a sort of wisdom, because through my observation and watchfulness, I learn a lot about human nature. I tend to listen more than talk about myself, and have been known to offer good advice to friends. People can come to me to talk about any issues weighing on their minds, because I don’t judge. I believe in the importance of lending a sympathetic ear. The Owl’s “gift is actually ‘soul wisdom’ more than intellectual knowledge’” [3]. Through my heightened awareness, I gain a sort of intuitive knowledge – or perhaps the experiences I observe simply enhance my instincts. Whatever the case, I’ve gained a lot of intuitive knowledge through my habits of observation. I feel this connection to the Owl and its large, round, watchful eyes.

There is a lot I hope to learn from Owl. I tend to be indecisive and somewhat flighty – until I’ve settled on whatever decision my instincts tell me to. Owl is solid and strong and knows exactly what to do. Owl is fearless and proud, and I am not. Owl is powerful and knowledgeable and holds an ancient wisdom in its spirit, and I am honored to be guided by it. It is not a touchy-feely, warm creature, but its presence is comforting, its steely protectiveness a blanket of safety.

The Hummingbird, on the other hand, feels like my best friend. Or perhaps my twin. Or maybe the animal manifestation of me.

Whatever the case, there is a kinship between us. I have only had one physical encounter with a hummingbird, but the creature has always held a sort of elusive fascination over me. In Evansville, when I was a child, we grew plenty of flowers and plants. Due to the lovely weather, we spent much of our time outdoors, playing rambunctiously in the backyard with our rabbits or relaxing on the patio with snacks. One day, we had the glass doors open while we ate in the kitchen, and all of a sudden, my mother spoke up in a hushed tone of awe. She’d spotted a hummingbird! I caught a glimpse of it, and was absolutely floored by its breathtaking beauty and otherworldly speed. It was a magical creature, flitting here and there in flashes of jewel bright color, partaking of the sweet nectar our plentiful flowers had to offer.

Physically, we are somewhat similar. We are both considered small in stature and perhaps a little frail or delicate in nature. We are fond of color – though I may not dress as brightly as a hummingbird, as an artist I have a deep appreciation of rich, gem-like colors. We are both quiet and loving and more than slightly intoxicated with the sheer joy of life. We both have very optimistic views, and are known for our happiness. I find that smiling is my natural state of being, and always look on the positive side of any situation. Life is too short to focus on the negatives! Also, I’ve had some seriously low points in my life when I lost that attitude, and have learned that there is always a silver lining to any cloud and that the important thing is to keep up a joyful outlook.

However, appearances are also deceiving. Hummingbird looks delicate, but is really a survivor. In fact, Hummingbird consumes more than its own weight in nectar, and has no fat – its rapid metabolism ensures that it is constantly in danger of starving to death [4]. This requires the creature to be strong and powerful in order to continue in the life it so enjoys. I too, may look small and gentle, but I am also a black belt in tae kwon do. It is not a trait I reveal in everyday conversation, but the fact that I too am a survivor lies beneath my surface.

Like Hummingbird, I appreciate beauty. It spends its entire life amongst flowers, drinking the sweet ambrosia of their nectar. It is drawn to color, to beautiful things. As an artist, I love aesthetics. I like finding beauty in conventionally ugly things. I like finding ugliness in beautiful things. I like imperfections. I like being surrounded by beauty, and I decorate my environment to suit my tastes. I am happiest when my surroundings are lovely and inspiring. The Hummingbird’s rapidly beating wings are so swift they look ethereal. They create a humming sound like music, and accompany the Hummingbird throughout its life. I live my life to the sound of music as well. If I don’t have it physically playing somewhere near me, there will be a song in my head humming through my blood. It’s the music of inspiration, the music to which I beat my drums, the music to which I see the world.

More than anything else, Hummingbird and I share a childlike sense of wonder. I often feel much younger than I am. I find it hard to believe that I am already 18 – in fact, this summer, I told a stranger I was 16, before correcting myself and informing him I was in fact 17, before remembering that no, I was actually 18. I spend a lot of time around those much older than me, so I can bring out the childishness in them too. Hummingbird is free and light and carefree, and I try to be too. I don’t want to be weighed down by worries or burdened by negative thoughts. I am playful and silly, and Hummingbird is too. I am sensitive and don’t let others close to me very easily or quickly, like the delicate bird, but I love to travel and wish I could fly from place to place. I am curious about everything, and love to explore. Hummingbird spends its lifetime in the air, flitting from flower to flower, and I dream of flitting from city to city throughout the world.

Learning what my spirit animals came as a surprise to me, but once I learned more about each and discovered the connections we have, everything seemed to slide into place. It is clear that I have an affinity with flying creatures, which I actually expected. The freedom of flight and the openness of the vast sky, the ability to explore beyond the horizon and do absolutely whatever is desired have always fascinated me. It’s because I love discovery, and there are a few things I have recently discovered:

I am human.

I am Owl.

I am Hummingbird.

I am animal.

FINAL WORD COUNT

With quotations: 2018

Without quotations: 1946

ENDNOTES

[1] Andrews, Ted. “Animal-speak: The Spiritual and Magical Powers of Creatures Great and Small.” in Composition and Reading in World Literature, edited by Professor Bump, 63. Jenn’s Copy & Binding, 2010

[2] Luttichau, Chris. Animal Spirit Guides: Discover Your Power Animal & the Shamanic Path. London: CICO Books, 2009. Print.

[3] Farmer, Stephen D. Power Animals: How to Connect With Your Spirit Animal Guide. California: Hay House Inc, 2004. Print.

[4] Hummingbird Metabolism: Ruby-throated “Hungrybirds.” Hummingbird: Journey North. Web. 20 Sept. 2010. http://www.learner.org/jnorth/tm/humm/EnergyTorpor.html.

IMAGES

1. mrscjacksonsclass.com

2. trekearth.com

3. I took this picture myself

4. lennieappelquist.com