How Can I Help?

"This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty." (20)

I was having a conversation with my younger brother this weekend, and it was one of the best talks we've ever had - it was the first time we actually honestly discussed issues about ourselves and the way we think about life and the world. For once, I truly feel like I've learned about who he is the way he himself percieves himself, and not the way I know him as my younger brother. I got to learn about him as a human being, and hope he learned about me in the same way.

My not-so-little little brother is one of my favorite people ever.

Something we talked about was our concepts of love. Both of us are completely different people - we don't really agree on much except for our tastes in books and movies. Our life philosophies are total opposites, our behavior dissimilar, and our view of the world and people don't mesh at all. Despite that, I wouldn't wish for anything to change - he is who he is, and I am who I am.

He does not believe in love. He doesn't think it exists - he thinks of it all as a scientific process. I, on the other hand, feel so full of love that I don't know what to do with it all. I love my family more than words can say, I love my friends more than they'll ever know, and I love complete strangers just because they share this world and this air and this life with me. My parents think that I'm too trusting, that I don't take care to consider that people might not be exactly who they say they are... but I think its just because I naturally believe in people. I'm not saying I'm an all-loving saintly creature who is super positive and sees only the good in people - I am so far away from being perfect its not even funny.

But I love. I love a lot. And I like being the way I am.

"The pain of others gives rise to a desire to help, to comfort, to touch, to say, 'I'm here, I'm with you, I understand.'" (56)

I understand how hard it is though for humans in general to reach out and love one another - to love those beyond their immediate circles. The suicide of a few weeks ago - actually, all the recent suicides, brings this thought painfully to mind. The poor young man who shot himself on UT's campus, the children unable to continue living with the bullying that came with being gay - all of these incidents show that love is not being distributed as it should. I wonder what could have happened if these suffering individuals had realized how much they'd been cared for. If someone had given them a hug when they most needed it. If someone had looked them straight in the eye, and told them, "I care."

Is it so hard to do?

I couldn't help it!